When People Pleasing Goes Beyond Making Other People Happy

You enjoy making others happy and want others to get along. It’s important to you that everyone is comfortable.

Even when it means you’re not comfortable.

Chances are from a young age it was instilled in you to not rock the boat, don’t be a problem, or be on your best behavior.

Maybe you’re really intune to your feelings but also other’s feelings as well.

Sometimes, you may put your feelings onto them and assume that's how they would feel. That feels uncomfortable, so you do your best to avoid that.

People-pleasing is all about avoidance and in this blog, I will share with you how people-pleasing impacts your mental health and wellbeing.

I’m a therapist in Wilmington, NC, and specialize in working with stressed-out and overwhelmed professional women. Most often my clients experience patterns of people-pleasing, anxiety, and burnout. I provide online therapy in North Carolina and Maryland.

Does all of this sound familiar?

Start therapy with me today by clicking the button and scheduling your free 15-minute consultation.

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Keep reading to learn how people-pleasing can impact you.

7 Ways People Pleasing Impacts Your Mental Health and Wellbeing

People-pleasing tendencies can be so natural that at times you don’t even know you’re you’re doing it but the impact of these behaviors can impact you greatly. Check out these 7 ways people-pleasing can impact your mental health.

Stress and Anxiety

People pleasing can lead to increased levels of stress and anxiety as you worry about not living up to others’ expectations or pleasing everyone. This can cause feelings of overwhelm and physical symptoms such as headaches, stomachaches, and difficulty sleeping.

Low Self-Esteem

When you focus too much on trying to please others, it can lead to a lack of self-confidence and low self-esteem. You may start to feel like your worth is based on what other people think of you, and this can be damaging to your mental health.

Loss of Identity

People pleasing can also lead to a loss of identity as you become so focused on making everyone else happy that you forget who you are or what makes you happy. This can result in an inability to make decisions or take risks, which could prevent you from reaching your full potential.

Poor Boundaries

Constantly putting other people’s needs before your own can lead to poor boundaries in relationships, both personal and professional. This means that people may take advantage of your willingness to please them without considering how it affects you or your well-being.

Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

People pleasing often leads to unhealthy coping mechanisms such as drinking alcohol or overeating to cope with the stress of trying to please everyone all the time. This can have a negative impact on both physical and mental health over time if left unchecked.

Difficulty Saying No

One of the biggest problems with people pleasing is that it can make it difficult for someone to say no when asked for something. People pleasers often feel guilty if they don't do what someone else asks of them, even if it means sacrificing their own needs or desires to do so. This can lead to feelings of resentment and frustration over time, as people-pleasers may feel like they have no control over their own lives.

Resentment

Another way that people pleasing can affect mental health is through resentment. When trying too hard to please others, you may start feeling resentful towards them for not appreciating your efforts or for taking advantage of you. This resentment can lead to feelings of anger and unhappiness that can take a toll on our mental health over time.

Begin Online Therapy for Stress and Overwhelm at Calm Waters Counseling

Being a people-pleaser you’re so worried about everyone else so they don’t have to experience uncomfortable feelings and so that you don’t have to experience uncomfortable feelings.

It’s important to recognize the impact these behaviors can have on your mental health and well-being.

I use a treatment style called Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to help women learn better ways to respond to their thoughts and feelings and develop healthier boundaries to create more balance in their lives.

Click to see if ACT Therapy would be helpful for you.

Are you ready to get started in online therapy for people-pleasing and stress? Follow these three easy steps below:

1| Schedule the consultation - Select a date and time for your consultation.

2| Complete the questionnaire - Within 24 hours of requesting a consultation, you will receive an email confirming and containing a link to a short questionnaire. This should be filled out 24 hours before the consultation.

3| Participate in the phone call - Once you have completed the questionnaire, I will give you a call at the scheduled time for the consultation. During our conversation, I will gather additional information about you and your therapy objectives.

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Additional Online Therapy Services at Calm Waters Counseling

In addition to working with busy professional women stressed and overwhelmed, at Calm Waters Counseling we focus on other areas of focus too, including:

Perfectionism Therapy - Your expectations are high and often unmet by others. Your perfectionistic tendencies can cause stress and disrupt your most significant relationships.

Burnout Counseling - Somehow, you've traded motivation and enjoyment in your work for exhaustion and apprehension. You've wondered whether it's you, the job, or something else entirely.

Anxiety Therapy - The concerns and constant rumination keep you awake at night. Concentrating and focusing have become increasingly challenging. You know you're not yourself, but nothing seems to provide relief.