5 Tips on How to Boost Self-Compassion
Self-Compassion is Important and Essential to Your Mental Health and Wellbeing
Stop me if this sounds familiar…
You are going about your day with so many things going on in your head such as work reminders, mom duties to take care of, the thought that you need to remember to ask your partner if they took care of that thing you asked them about 3 days ago, and trying not to forget that you need to pick up your dry cleaning on the way home this evening.
So with all of that swirling around in your head (and despite your best efforts of using the good ol sticky note reminder system), you realize you made a mistake with some documents your boss asked you to complete.
*Cue the inner critic*
“I’m not good enough.”
“Why can’t I just get stuff together?”
“My boss is going to think I’m an idiot.”
“I should have been paying better attention.”
“It’s only a matter of time before they hire someone else and realize I suck at my job.”
How about those feelings of guilt, shame, embarrassment, dread, anxiety, and stress that are also creeping up and taking over.
So now we have become annoyed and frustrated with ourselves and we are having feelings about our feelings. And in the tough moments, naturally, we resort to beating ourselves up rather than extending a helping hand to make it through.
In today’s blog, I’m sharing with you how you can start to boost self-compassion and practice being more kind to yourself.
I am an online anxiety therapist in Wilmington NC and provide therapy for anxious high achieving women and entrepreneurs in Maryland and North Carolina. In addition to anxiety treatment, I also specialize in treatment for perfectionism and offer burnout counseling for work stress.
Take the first step to get started in therapy with me. Click the button below to online reserve your free 15-minute consultation on the date and time of your choice.
By the end of this blog, you’ll learn more about self-compassion and have some tools to start boosting your self-compassion.
5 Tips on How to Build Self-Compassion
Building self-compassion does not come easily. Our brains are automatically hardwired to think of the negative. However, using some of these tips below can help you think and feel about yourself differently when you are experiencing some tough moments.
Tip #1 to Build Self-Compassion: Practice Mindfulness
When hurt and pain are involved, part of bringing in self-compassion is simply to acknowledge hurt and pain are present. Very often when these feelings show up, avoidance takes over through distraction or escapism. If we choose to continuously avoid then we also can’t take the necessary steps forward to heal.
Tip #2 to Build Self-Compassion: You’re Human
In life, hurt and pain is inescapable. At some point as humans, we will all experience difficult times and feelings of pain. These feelings come about because as humans we care, love, and connect. Normalizing and validating this as part of the human experience can help to build up self-compassion.
Tip #3 to Build Self-Compassion: Be Your Own Friend
When beginning to talk with my clients about self-compassion, this is often one of the places I start first.
Most of my clients can connect with caring for others. Treating a friend with kindness and compassion is a normal response when the friend is experiencing feelings of hurt or self-doubt and yet we let our inner critic beat us up and beat us down. We follow the bread crumb trail and spiral into negativity and give our thoughts supreme power to the point of believing they must be true.
But what if we were to treat ourselves like we treat our closest and dearest friends? What if we said the things we say to our friends to ourselves? What would that sound like? How would that feel?
It isn’t guaranteed that all the problems will be solved but chances are it can make tackling those problems a lot easier if we hold ourselves kindly, gently, and with support.
Tip #4 to Build Self-Compassion: Allow Space for the Pain
Similar to tip #1, making room for the feelings of hurt and pain can give you the freedom to engage in parts of your life rather than staying stuck or taking part in more self-destructive behaviors.
Tip #5 to Build Self-Compassion: Offer Yourself Some Comfort
Along with tip #3, sometimes we just need to also physically comfort ourselves in hard moments. In addition to how we practice self-talk, remembering to self-soothe in physical ways is key too.
Start Anxiety Therapy in Wilmington NC at Calm Waters Counseling
It is so easy to get caught up in the negative, in the pain, in the hurt, and in the story, we tell ourselves about ourselves. It is natural for the mind to go to those places and it happens to everyone, even the most accomplished or the one you think has it together the most. But the reality is no one is immune to hurt and pain.
Self-compassion is key when working through the hard stuff or experiencing thoughts and feelings of hurt and pain. It is most often something that gets tossed to the side and disregarded too.
Bringing in self-compassion can be a powerful tool for healing.
I use Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for anxiety treatment.
Learn more about ACT and how it can be helpful for you.
Get started in anxiety therapy at Calm Waters Counseling by following these 4 simple steps:
Click the button below to schedule your free 15-minute consultation
Complete the brief questionnaire sent to your email before the consultation
Meet with your anxiety therapist
Start living your life with more self-compassion
Therapy for High Achieving Women in Wilmington, NC at Calm Waters Counseling
Therapy for high achievers is beneficial and allows a space to work through challenges high achievers experience regularly.
Learn more about me and my Wilmington, NC virtual therapy practice.
When I work with the anxious high-achieving or “Type A” woman, often this client will come to the session and talk about more than just anxiety.
Check out all services at Calm Waters Counseling, listed below:
Anxiety therapy in Wilmington, NC
Treatment for Perfectionism in Maryland
Burnout Counseling in Wilmington, NC
Therapy for Imposter Syndrome in Wilmington, NC
Online Anxiety Therapy in Maryland
High achievers have been able to make the best out of using online therapy because of the benefits online therapy has to offer. It is a great option for busy women on the go!
Audio and video have made it possible to feel as if you are in the therapy room but from the comfort of your own space. Because of this possibility, using ACT with online therapy is possible.
Offering online therapy as an added benefit has allowed me to see clients in multiple states. No longer do you have to disrupt taking care of yourself simply because you aren’t able to make it into the therapy office.
If you are interested in learning more about online therapy for anxiety in your state, click the links below to get started.
online therapy for anxiety in North Carolina
online anxiety therapy in Maryland
Still, have questions? Click the buttons below to learn even more!
Written by: Laura Rippeon, LCSW, LCSW-C
Updated 3/17/23