Why Do High Achievers Have Difficulty Asking for Help?
I’m A High Achiever But I Have A Hard Time Asking For Help…
Goal setting and goal achieving. That’s what high-achievers do baby!
(in my best Wedding Crashers voice)
But what about when you get stuck, lose motivation, or hit some speed bumps along the way?
Do you sit in it? Do you spiral and get caught up in the “not good enough” thoughts?
Do you beat yourself up because you “should” know what to do or how to handle a situation?
What if there was someone or something that could help you?
Asking for help and support is no easy feat for a high-achiever.
I am willing to bet that often you try to avoid all costs, at least initially.
Today, I am sharing with you 5 reasons why a high achiever may have difficulty asking for help.
I am an anxiety therapist in Wilmington, NC and exclusively work with high-achieving women experiencing stress, anxiety, perfectionism, and burnout.
I provide virtual anxiety therapy in North Carolina and Maryland.
Ready to get started? Click the button below to schedule your free 15-minute consultation with me.
Keep reading to learn why high achievers have a hard time asking for help.
5 Reasons Why High Achievers Have Difficulty Asking For Help
Asking for help is no easy task…but why is that?
I tend to look at it as a good ol’ “it’s complicated” (thanks Facebook) because there are many different reasons why it can be hard for a high-achiever to ask for help. Check out my top 5 reasons in no particular order.
Reason #1 Asking for help is hard: Little Miss Independent
As a high-achiever, chances are you’ve kinda been operating in a way that didn’t necessarily involve a lot of other folks and if it did it had the potential to get messy (flashback to the trauma of group project days).
So instead you are just used to getting the job done solo.
I mean no one else is going to get it done as you can amirite?
Reason #2 Asking for help is hard: Prove your worth
Women constantly have to prove themselves in the workforce especially boss b*tches, entrepreneurs and business owners, etc.
In addition, imposter syndrome can hit pretty hard too.
Because of these things, there can be a pull to take it all on yourself and be Superwoman.
But even Superwoman needs some help now and then too.
Reason #3 Asking for help is hard: Vulnerability
Everyone’s favorite…vulnerability!
Doesn’t seem to matter what it is concerning the act of being vulnerable can evoke so much. That shit is scary.
Reason #4 Asking for help is hard: Fear and anxiety
As mentioned above being vulnerable can be hard and anxiety-producing, especially if asking for help is not something you are used to doing if it wasn’t modeled for you early on, and if it doesn’t feel safe trusting others.
Reason #5 Asking for help is hard: Guilt and shame
Guilt, shame, and embarrassment are also common feelings that come up when asking for help.
Often, high-achievers place a lot of expectations on themselves and their mind will them they “should” be able to do this or give them negative messages about why they “can’t” do something.
When these messages show up and these feelings show up it can keep you stuck and make it more difficult to reach out and get some support or help.
Anxiety Therapy in Wilmington, NC at Calm Waters Counseling
Asking for help can bring up a lot of thoughts and feelings such as shame, embarrassment, anxious thoughts, and negative thoughts about yourself.
The reality is we all need some support at times. This may be difficult for high-achievers to accept and it can keep you stuck if you let it.
In reality, asking for help and allowing yourself to receive support can help you to reach your goals.
I use a style of therapy called Acceptance and Commitment Therapy.
ACT focuses on improving flexibility with thoughts and feelings, identifies values, and encourages being in the present moment.
Learn more to see if ACT would be helpful for you.
Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for anxiety treatment
Get started in therapy at Calm Waters Counseling by following these 4 simple steps:
Click the button below to schedule your free 15-minute consultation
Complete the brief questionnaire sent to your email before the consultation
Meet with your anxiety therapist
Start meeting your goals and living your life in rich and meaningful ways
Therapy for High Achievers in Frederick, MD at Calm Waters Counseling
High achievers put a lot of pressure on themselves. This can be motivating and be one of the challenges high-achievers experience. This is why therapy for high-achievers is beneficial.
Learn more about me and my Wilmington, NC online therapy practice.
Check out the helpful services at Calm Waters Counseling, listed below:
Anxiety therapy in Wilmington, NC
Treatment for Perfectionism in Maryland
Burnout Counseling in Wilmington, NC
Therapy for Imposter Syndrome in Wilmington, NC
Online Anxiety Therapy for High Achievers in Wilmington, NC
If you prefer to have your therapy sessions from the comfort of your own space, I understand entirely.
There are a lot of benefits to using online therapy appointments and virtual anxiety therapy is effective.
Interested in online ACT for anxiety treatment?
If online therapy seems like a good option for you, click the links below to learn more about where you live.
online therapy for anxiety in North Carolina
online anxiety therapy in Maryland
More questions? More answers!
Written by: Laura Rippeon, LCSW, LCSW-C